Lagniappe News

By

Queen Macoomeh

Copyright August 2003

Firs’ to begin, ah have to show mih broughtupsy and say ‘tanks’ to all all yuh who write me over de past two weeks. Tanks fuh your condolences on de lorse of my darlin’ granmudda. Ah miss she too bad eh, but dat lady teach mih to keep mih head up so I not going to disappoint she by not coming back in my community to keep mine’in everybody business. Some people get frighten I might stay away, but Ma uses to enjoy all my commess here in de papers so I not going to stop de picong. Every word I write from now on, go be in she memory.

As usual, ah have plenty ole talk to give all yuh. A lady akse mih where ah does get all mih lyrics from. But is all yuh self who giving mih de gossip. Is my people who does give me so much chat dat ah feel like aksing SHARE to open out a whole newspaper jes for de mauvais langue. We could call it "Lagniappe News".

Look for example. Las’ week me an’ a lady was talkin’. She akse mih who it is I mean when I say ‘outsiders’. She akse mih if is White people I talking ‘bout. Ah tell she no. Outsider doh mean White people. She forget dat it have White people in de Caribbean or what? De ting what does really make me glad about my region is de way we have in all de races. When I say outsider I mean doze who is not a part of we. Dem who knows nutting about we. Dem who feel we home swinging from coconut tree. Dem who feel all we does do is smoke ganja all day long or dat none of we have a full set of teet in we head. Dem is de outsider.

It have plenty people who not from de West Indies who like we too bad. Ent troot? Dey does come in we ting up here and go dong in we islands. Dey know how we does talk. Dey does eat we food and drink we mauby and gingerbeer. I know plenty people who could give mih chapter and verse about my islands; who know de difference between zouk and calypso. Dey know what year Bob Marley dead and what chune Phase II play for Panorama. I hear plenty of dem say how dey never miss a Caribana and dey could tell you where every West Indian shop is. Is not dem I talking about when I say ‘outsider’. Not everyting is Black or White.

Yuh see me? I doh have time to worry about skin colour. When I choose my frens I doh study whedder dey have blue eyes or straight hair. Ah does watch dey movements. I does look to see if dey does keep dey word. I bounce up enough people who not too nice to know dat jes because your skin colour and mines is de same, dat doh mean you could be my fren. Sometime is yuh own people who does make yuh ketch yuh nen-nen. Ah lie? You have to take time to learn my culture or share my life; if you doh make it your business to show me your style and respeck mines den I have nutting to say to you. Is you who lorse not me.

I like no better joke dan when ah outsider realize we have plenty ting to share and dey come an’ akse me about we business. I like when dey siddong wid me in de roti shop and share my food. I like when ah see dem in Caribana. Dey jumping outta time but enjoying deyself. I like when dey akse mih to take dem in de panyard or in a fete or concert. I like when dey try to talk in we patois – ah does laugh but ah does feel nice dat dey trying. Dem so I could graduate from outsider to insider. I bounce up people from all over de world who willing to let mih learn dem my ways and I always ready to learn dem own.

But mark my words eh? It have some West Indians who are outsiders. Doh laugh, is troot. Some of we own who get so standoffish dat I doh even want to see dem. Let dem stop dere.

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