Copyright May 2003

Ah hear how de Caribana Cultural Committee get troo and dey planning fuh dis year 2003. Ah glad. Ah know is some pulling and tugging going on inside but people does enjoy de party. We culture need de time to free up and hear a little music and see some mas pass. CCC, do yuh ting nice eh? Queen Macoomeh does pong all yuh but ah love mih culture. Ah giving yuh full support! Whole year we coop up inside from de snow, is time to put on some Bermuda shorts and come outside. I like mas too bad, so all yuh bound to see me in de road chipping dat day.

Caribana and all de udda carnivals is not only costume and wine'in. Ah does get vex when ah hear people say is only dat. Is part of we culture, doh argue wid me. People does talk about carnival as if is someting evil or bad. Dey does only see de lil slackness what does go on. Dey does complain about de music and de noise, dey does complain about de chinky costume. Dey does complain how dem woman does riggle up in de road. Dey does complain about every blasted ting.

Leh mih explain all yuh something eh? I not saying yuh have to come dong to de parade or de shows. I for one not going in yuh house an' beg yuh to come. But if yuh never see it before, or yuh doh like it, yuh must not look down on or chastise de ones who do.

De King and Queen show does be my ting. Ah does pay mih money an' go every year and take snap. Ah even get boof las' year. Ah was blocking de judges and security come an akse mih if mih fadda is a glass maker.

De portrayer and de designer and de makers deserve nuff respeck. Hear what I tell you. Even self if you doh like mas you have to give respeck to somebody who tink up someting in dey head and make it come to life on a stage. Yuh went Lion King show an Phantom of de Opera and bawl ray and clap ent? Yuh went in de Dragon Boat race dong Centre Islan' an admire dem boats ent?

What make you tink we art any less precious?

Yuh complain about de jam session on Lakeshore. Yuh say we like ants. But yuh gorn up by Canada Wonderlan', had to park quite behine Gawd back, walk a mile an' a half to de gate, stan' up in one long gawdfadda line, pay a house rent to get inside, yuh in de middle of two million people, lining up for every blessed ride. An' to make matters more worser, people doh skylark in de line like we. Dey have dey nose in de air and dey face set up like dey jes' take a dose of senna. When I lining up to get inside Lamport or Exhibition Stadium wid my people, is endless ole talk and laughing. We doh have no stranger. Tell mih ah lie nuh?

Yuh bawling how de women in Caribana have on nex' to nuttin'. How dey too outlawcious. I mihself have one or two lil pounds to lose so I doh try an fit in a size small when I know ah have a size boboloops body. Yes, some of de women does have dey ting outside. But de human body not evil. Yes, some women does wine like dey hip doh have a hinge - ah not going to lie. But boy whole year we taking tunda from de overseer, we have on ten coat, snow like peas, S.A.R.S. had we frighten. We have a few hours coming up in de hot sun to free up. Oh gorm well give we a blinking chance fuh one day nuh man! If yuh fine we look lolless den DOH LOOK! Shims!

Outside people does fly dong on Lakeshore and join we in we parade. People who have no sense of riddum, who cah wine even if yuh pay dem, dey coming dong and enjoying we ting. Dey mout' open to see we mas, to see how we take two piece'ah clawt an' some glitter paint an' make someting dat look like a Broadway production. An' you is one'ah we an' still crying we dong.

Ma tell me if yuh cah say nutting nice about somebody, den yuh should hush yuh blasted mout'. You agree?

20022003